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In a series of declassified documents containing accounts of wars, rumors of wars, and battles that have no victors or defeated opponents or worldwide destruction that can be defined by any costs or empires captured, there is a hearty bunch of terrified witness to the fact that Cthulhu was a main concern for the multibillionaire corporation known as the Government of the United States. While there does seem to be a list of who was involved directly in the dismantling of the beast known as Mister Squid Face, it's unclear how many from the corporation of the United States had been assigned the task of the impossible conquest to take down an ancient Slime Lord that's been nothing but trouble. (Full article...)

• ... that Joseph Stalin (Pictured) is the the real Man of Steel?

• ... that the square root of 69 is 8 something?
• ... that Jesus loves you, but that's probably not enough to get to heaven?
• ... that over 30 million Chinese peasants died in the Great Leap Forwards due to inadequate long-jump scores?
• ... that Bruce Lee could juggle two balls with his penis?
• ... that those suspicious white spots on your professor's blazer are in fact mayonnaise?
• ... that Richard Nixon was well-known for his honesty and often referred to as Honest Dick?
• ... that the butler did it?