Twister (I) (1996)
Bill Paxton: Bill Harding
Photos
Quotes
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[about Bill's new fiancée, while in his truck]
Bill : She's a... a therapist.
Jo : Oh... Yours?
Bill : Christ, you couldn't resist, could you?
Jo : What? I'm not saying you *need* therapy.
Bill : What? Wait, wait, wait, I need therapy?
Jo : I didn't say that. I didn't *say* that.
Bill : What could I possibly need a therapist for? Huh? You're the doctor, tell me!
Jo : I don't know... inability to finish things?
Bill : "Inability to finish things"?
Jo : Maybe rushing into things you can't quite commit to.
Bill : Commitment?
Jo : You asked!
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Joey : [Discussing at Meg's on the tornadoes they have seen so far at Meg's home at her dining table, eating steak and eggs] No, that was a good size twister. What was it, an F3?
Bill : Solid F2.
Melissa : See, now you have lost me again.
Bill : It's the Fujita scale. It measures a tornado's intensity by how much it eats.
Melissa : Eats?
Bill : Destroys.
Laurence : That one we encountered back there was a strong F2, possibly an F3.
Beltzer : Maybe we'll see some 4's.
Haynes : That would be sweet!
Bill : 4 is good. 4 will relocate your house very efficiently.
Melissa : Is there an F5?
[Everyone goes dead silent]
Melissa : What would that be like?
Jason 'Preacher' Rowe : The Finger of God.
Melissa : None of you has ever seen an F5?
Bill : ...Just one of us.
[Looks upstairs, indicating Jo]
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Melissa : [at Meg's home at her dining table, eating steak and eggs] Why do you call Billy "The Extreme?"
Dusty : Because Billy *is* "The Extreme."
Jason 'Preacher' Rowe : Bill is the most outta control son of a bitch in the game!
Bill : [looking at Jo] No, I think I came in second.
Dusty : So we get this one near Daleton, right?
Rabbit : Oh, God.
Jo : You guys have got to get some new stories. I'm gonna go wash up.
Dusty : And we are way too close. And Jo's got the vid on it right, she's filming it. And all of the sudden outta nowhere, this shitty lookin' green Valiant comes pulling up right in the way.
Beltzer : [points to Bill] And this loser stumbles out of the car, he's got like a bottle of Jack Daniel's in his hand...
Dusty : He's naked!
Rabbit : He is *butt* naked!
Beltzer : Naked!
Bill : NOT naked! I was NOT naked!
Beltzer : [whispering & laughing in Melissa's ear] He was without apparel.
Bill : Half naked.
Dusty : Naked. Ok, so Jo's yelling at him to get out of the way, right?
[all laugh]
Dusty : And he just strolls up to the twister, says 'have a drink', and he chucks the bottle into the twister, and it NEVER hits the ground.
Jason 'Preacher' Rowe : The twister caught it, and sucked it right up!
Bill : [directing towards Melissa] Honey, this is a tissue of lies. See, there was another Bill, an evil Bill, and I killed him.
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Bill : [after the tornado pass by them at the drive in movie theater] Honey, it's Meg. I gotta go.
Melissa : I'm going back.
Bill : Good, good, you'll be safe at the motel. I'll see you in the morning.
Melissa : I won't be there.
Bill : What? Why? What are you saying?
Melissa : I'm saying goodbye.
Bill : No...
Melissa : You know what? I can't compete with this. I don't even know where to start.
Bill : Wait, don't do this now, please.
Melissa : Sooner or later it would have ended, we both know that. The funny thing is... I'm not that upset. What does that mean?
Bill : I never meant for any of this to happen,
Melissa : Oh Billy, I know. It's okay. You go ahead. She needs you. I hope that Aunt Meg's okay.
Bill : What about you?
Melissa : Oh, don't worry about me. I know my way home.
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[Jo is salvaging belongings from her crashed truck and looking at Bill's new truck]
Jo : You got full coverage on that truck?
Bill : Liability only.
Jo : [thoughtfully] Liability only...
Jo : It's a very pretty truck.
Melissa : [smiling] Thank you.
Bill : Don't even think about it.
[Jo keeps cleaning out her truck]
Bill : No way.
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[Bill needs Jo's signature on divorce papers]
Jo : So you want the papers?
Bill : I did drive all the way out here for 'em.
Jo : They're signed and ready.
Bill : Good, good. Let's see 'em.
Jo : Do you need them right this second?
Bill : Well, it'd be nice.
Jo : What's the urgent urgency? You act like you're getting married.
Bill : I am.
Jo : [after a shocked pause] Wow.
Bill : Yeah.
Jo : [while talking to her truck as Bill follows her] Is it Melinda?
Bill : Melissa.
Jo : Wasn't there a Melinda in there somewhere?
Bill : No, there's only been Melissa since you.
Jo : Boy, not much for browsing are you?
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Bill : [to Jo] Why can't we spend a normal day together?
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Jo : [in the truck, discussing Bill's current life changes] Hey, as long as you're happy...
Bill : I AM. I AM happy. I'm a happy person. I'm happy with my life. I'm happy with the way things are going in my life. I'm happy with... with...
Jo : Melissa?
Bill : I know her name! YES. I'm happy... with... Melissa!
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Dr. Jonas Miller : [explaining what his own version of Dorothy can do when Bill uppercuts him in the face] Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Bill : You son of a bitch. What'd you think, I wouldn't find out?
[grabs Jonas by his shirt and begins to fight]
Dr. Jonas Miller : What is the matter with you?
Bill : You stole my design, you son of a bitch.
[continues to fight with Jonas then Bill's team and Jonas' team breaks them up]
Dr. Jonas Miller : The hell are you talking about?
Bill : Dorothy. You took her, you damn thief.
Dr. Jonas Miller : [realizes what Bill is talking about] Oh, I get it. You want to take credit for MY design.
Bill : She was OUR idea and you know it.
Dr. Jonas Miller : Unrealized idea... unrealized.
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[Bill and Jo are in the shed hiding from the F5 tornado and bill sees water pipes coming out of the floor]
Bill : Here! These pipes go down at least thirty feet, if we anchor to them we might have a chance!
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Joey : [Computer beeps] We've got a touchdown!
Laurence : [On radio] We have touchdown! Touchdown! Tornado is on the ground!
Haynes : [Hands radio to Beltzer] Listen to this!
Laurence : Looks like it's heading down Route 33.
Bill : Jo, we're on 33.
Jo : What's the path?
Laurence : Looks like it's going about 35 mph.
Rabbit : [Looking around] Can you see this?
Allan Sanders : I can not see this. Where is it? Hello? Which way you guys looking?
Bill : Where, where, where...
Jo : Direction, Rabbit.
Rabbit : North northeast!
Beltzer : Do you see it?
Haynes : No.
Rabbit : North northeast, you copy?
Bill : Shit, it's coming right at us!
Laurence : Axis has gone vertical, gone vertical. Sucker's really gaining up strength.
Jo : You see it?
Bill : No...
[Takes radio]
Bill : Beltzer! We do not have a visual. Repeat, we do not have a visual. Help us out here!
Jo : Where is it?
Beltzer : Yeah, I got it Billy. Best motion I've ever seen. Looks like the base of this sucker's at least a half mile wide.
Bill : Rabbit?
Rabbit : If you are going east on 7, it should be coming right over that hill in a matter of minutes!
Allan Sanders : This is the one man, I feel it.
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Bill : [over radio] OK, Rabbit, time to impress me.
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Bill : [Rabbit is leading them through a field as a short cut to get ahead of Jonas] This is a field, Rabbit.
Rabbit : I know, keep going beyond it, right through that brush. See that brush right in front of you?
Bill : Yeah we see the brush, what's beyond that?
Rabbit : Beyond what?
Jo : Beyond what? Beyond the brush!
Bill : The brush, a brick wall, a bearded lady, what?
Rabbit : Oh, um... it's the highway, it's the highway.
Jo : [the team seems to be heading into nothing but taller brush] Where's the road, Rabbit?
Allan Sanders : Yeah where's the road man?
Rabbit : It should be any moment.
Bill : Watch out!
[Without warning, Jo almost slams right into Jonas's van as they reach the highway. The rest of Jo's team also force much of Jonas's caravan off the road]
Jason 'Preacher' Rowe : [Sarcastically] Hello! Shit.
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Dr. Jonas Miller : Today, we're gonna make history, so stick around. 'Cause the days of sniffing the dirt are over.
Laurence : Better than what *you* sniff.
Bill : We'll see who gets there first... "pal".
Dr. Jonas Miller : [to Bill] Oh, by the way. I really enjoy your weather reports.
[Jonas' crew laugh]
Bill : [runs at Jonas] You slime! I'm not through with you yet!
[Jo's crew break up the fight]
Laurence : [of Jonas] He's a corporate kiss-butt, man!
