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Reviews
Slaughter Nick for President (2012)
Surprisingly funny and moving
I recently discovered the light-hearted series Tropical Heat and streamed the whole enchilada. I was struck by resemblances between Rob Stewart and our beloved Bruce Campbell. Similarly handsome; Stewart's narration and his delivery of wisecracks and asides sound identical to Sir Bruce. Both have the same self-effacing comic flair, though Bruce became a legend by going over-the-top in horror flicks with Sam Raimi. Nick Slaughter's character and situation more closely remind me of Bruce's underrated Adventures of Briscoe County, Jr. And his co-starring role in Burn Notice.
The similarities extend here, as Stewart is stunned to find out he's a Serbian celebrity of almost heroic proportions, much like Bruce's emergence as a cult idol here. His trip to Serbia is full of warmth, humor and insight into their struggles throughout the 1990s, and the role comedic relief (largely from his old series) played in coping with oppression and hardship, and their ultimate success in establishing a freer and more democratic society.
Stewart's humility and appreciation of all he learned and experienced comes through convincingly. We like him! We really like him!
Bonekickers: Army of God (2008)
An intriguing start
I'm writing this mainly because the only other review is from one who denounces it as anti-Christian. That's absolutely wrong. It's anti-Zealot and anti-cult. The delusional, yet charismatic leader wants to reboot The Crusades, and gulls a bunch of young acolytes into taking up arms in support of his "mission".
When the protagonist team of archaeologists discovers relics in a part of England where shouldn't have been according to known history, the complications begin. Among them is a hunk of cedar that may have come from a crucifixion. Perhaps even THE crucifixion. It triggers a media frenzy and jump-starts the preacher's escalation from inflammatory words to violent action. Psychologically, the villainy could have just as easily been from fomenting any form of fascism or bigotry. This one fit with the artifacts and era they came from.
Along the way, he's denounced by many, including other Christians, making faith his excuse for megalomania, not the target of the story. Bottom line: don't trust zealots, whatever they're pushing.
Opération Luchador (2021)
Wrestlers and Nazis and Bombs! Oh my!
As mockumentaries go, it's not as laugh-out-loud funny as Spinal Tap or the brilliant handful made by Chris Guest, Fred Willard and their repertory band of co-conspirators that started with Waiting for Guffman. It's more tongue-in-cheek, in the fashion of a Mondo Cane; or the recent El Conde, which "revealed" that Chilean dictator Augusto Pinochet was actually a vampire.
This one sells its unlikely premise of a masked Mexican wrestler (Luchador) foiling several of Hitler's plots and turning the tide of World War II. The production blends b&w footage from newsreels and old movies with newly-staged "historical" scenes to tell the outrageous tale finally emerging from secret documents and classified files. Those are interspersed with with interview snippets from historians or those with personal connections to this unheralded heroic figure.
The narrator's dry tone makes it seem like a real doc, or college lecture with visual aids, enhanced by incorporation of actual players and events. It's a fun watch with a few surprising turns.
True Justice (2010)
Warnings before you begin
1 - If you like watching Seagal beat up bad guys with little effort, grab your snacks and beverages to watch a bunch of those scenes per episode. If you want to see him speak clearly or show any emotional range, fuggeddaboutit.
2 - The plots are almost comically convoluted, with more double-crosses and hidden agendas than one should have to endure.
3 - Be prepared for a whole lotta stupid. Characters regularly fire far more shots without reloading than their weapons could hold. Outgunned protagonists routinely waste ammo by firing multiple shots when conserving bullets is vital. Good guys with pistols are constantly facing machine guns, and rarely bringing the weapons needed to level the playing field. After downing a foe, they frequently fail to finish obviously necessary kills, or check the fallen bodies to be sure they're no longer a threat. Or pick up their weapons for much-needed firepower.
3 - More stupidity - When time is short and thugs are all over the place, Seagal wastes time and effort by beating guys up slowly rather than dispatching them efficiently to help the rest of his team with the rest of the minions.
4 - Several members of his team, including some who are actually enjoyable to watch, die along the way. The overall story doesn't really require that - and some occur off-camera, so they don't even get the poignant death scene they deserve. That raises questions as to the reason. Availability of cheaper replacements? Fed up with Seagal's ego running everything to his tastes? Better offers for other productions? Seagal creating turnover so viewers will stay more bonded with him than with the better actors around him?
5 - This one's a biggie. Season One sets up a huge cabal of bad guys with a nuclear threat, plus a personal revenge quest up their food chain of evil for Season Two. Even with the subsequent 2012 movie/extended episode, they don't finish the tasks!!!! The thing ends as if they were planning another installment that no one was interesting in funding. Or filming. Or committing air time for. If you crave closure, spend your time on another product.
Gola Barood (1989)
Almost a good movie
The plot outline was tried and true. Good cop killed for being too honest. Son goes into law enforcement to do right. Twist added of son rejecting harsh police tactics - especially brutalizing suspects and prisoners. He wants to change to more carrots and fewer sticks. Crime bosses, vulnerable women being protagonists' Achilles tendon true to genre traditions.
Reasonably decent casting. Some gratifying action sequences with a generous amount of mostly bloodless fighting and shooting. And, at 134 minutes, shorter than many of these productions.
But OMG! The dialog is an atrocity, with one overlong, pompous speech after another dragging this down to mediocrity, and making the running time feel longer than it is. Fast-forward through most of the facial closeups denoting speeches, and enjoy the meat without stuffing yourself on the fat.
Død snø 2 (2014)
Biggest sequel upswing in living (or undead) memory
The first Dead Snow was extremely mediocre. It was so so-so that I almost passed up this sequel, since they're rarely even equal to the originals, much less more entertaining. Huuuuuge exception here.
Round One was really a typical cabin-in-the-woods gorefest, with Nazi Zombies playing the role of the usual psycho slashers or demonic entities that ravage a group of vacationing teens or young adults. Everything that happened was formulaic, if not canon.
This one really ramps up the scale and the gore with one of the cleverest and most original scripts the genre ever produced. We're approaching Sean of the Dead territory in an under-the-radar package. If you like Sean and other comedic splatter flicks, this one won't disappoint.
(Probably an 8, but I gave it a 9 for the pleasant surprise factor.)
Busines of Betrayal (2022)
Not the guilty pleasure you expect.
The premise seems perfect for a sexploitation flick. This one turns out almost suitable for Disney. Women seduce rich men, not for one-nighters, but to earn trust and love, so they can learn where all their valuables are and rob them. They're all living together, working for a conscience-free boss.
The plot is slapdash, with much making little sense. The acting is unconvincing; the dialog is stilted, and the "action" sequences are amateurish. The sets are subpar, even for a low-budget effort.
This is the kind of thing one would watch for titillation. One would be severely shortchanged. No nudity. None. Nada. The most skin exposed is when in bikinis or lingerie. Skip it. If this review keeps others from wasting their time, at least something good will have come from the time I wasted.
Dos pistolas gemelas (1966)
Among the worst of the Spaghetti Westerns
The titular Bayona twins were cute and spirited in this otherwise lame attempt at a frontier rom-com. It was made in 1966, shortly before feminism rode into town. In throwback form, their characters are impressively adept with pistols and rifles, but get precious little mileage (or running time) for advancing the plot with their skills.
They put on a traveling medicine show with their grandpa, then wind up owning a dusty little ranch that's smack-dab in the middle of land-grab scheming by locals with money, minions and malice enough to make life miserable for the plucky lasses. Each twin falls for a hunky guy, overcoming frictions on the path(s) to true love(s). Not enough action or comedy to fill either style of boots.
Lóng quán mì gông (1988)
Good fights; mild eye candy; not much else
Bruce Le does his usual pale imitation of Bruce Lee;s trademark shtick in a story that's more convoluted than it needed to be for getting us from one fight to the next. A few minor characters pop up and vanish, almost at random. Lieh Lo gets to play yet another bad guy, overacting with his dialog, but brandishing his usual effectiveness when fists start to fly.
A couple of action sequences have relatively unique aspects - notably pistol-packing and blade-wielding little people among the minions of the bad guys. Plus one seaside fight offers an illogical, yet eye-pleasing bit of novelty. The story - such as it is - sets Bruce on a treasure hunt, competing with two sets of rivals for the scattered missing clues to its location.
Overall, not much reason to put this one high on your genre priority list, but you could do worse. I certainly have.
Masantonio (2021)
Some praise and a warning
Masantonio is a fascinating character. In the tradition of brilliant, yet haunted sleuths, he reaches heights in both. He'd vanished for 17 years without explanation, making his return to Genoa as much a cause of resentment, as hope by his superior that he will be able to lead a new section designated for finding the area's missing persons.
Throughout the season, we gradually learn bits of his backstory that account for much of his current hangdog mood and some of why he's so exceptional at the tasks assigned to him and his extremely patient partner. The suspense factor is solid, with complex plots to keep you guessing about the outcome until the end of each episode. Even better, they don't all wind up as happily as most mainstream tales of this sort do. That puts extra meat on the bones of scripts.
Fine series, but the warning is that the season ends with a significant cliffhanger, and I don't know if a second season is coming. If that's acceptable, enjoy an intriguing character and the fine supporting cast around him.
Murdoch Mysteries: Why is Everybody Singing? (2024)
A mostly laudable effort
As I write this, 5 of the 7 posted reviews are either 9-10 or 1-2. I find those extremes amusing. When Murdoch strays from its normal tenor, it tends to trigger strong fan responses in both directions. Getting folks to care that much is a tribute to the series. I'm usually in the plus camp on these novelties.
This one is a mixed bag. I was pleasantly surprised by most of the musical performances, with Julia's voice leading the pack. The choreography was also admirable. But the quality of the songs was not up to snuff in terms of melody or relevance to the story. The opening production number came out of nowhere, and did nothing to introduce the plot.
Other light series have tossed in an outlier musical episode. A couple that come to mind are Psych and Scrubs. The former was pretty good, but the latter set the gold standard, with several Broadway-worthy melodies, and lyrics that were spot-on for the characters and the story, rewarding those who'd come to know them best. Perhaps if I hadn't seen than one (several times by now), my score for this one would have been higher.
When Things Were Rotten (1975)
Rose-colored memories
I absolutely loved this show when it aired, and have been a Mel Brooks fan from the get-go. When I found that most of the episodes were available on YouTube, I all but salivated as I clicked them onto my Watch Later list.
After seeing 4 of the first 5, I must confess to some disappointment. They seem more silly than clever now, compared to their effect back then. Perhaps it's because this sort of playful spoof was more of a novelty in 1975 than today, with all the TV shows and movies plying those waters ever since. Or maybe it seems less engaging compared to Mel's later Men in Tights, which I enjoy re-watching every couple of years, or so.
So if you revisit the series, try to focus on the context of its day, and think of it as a rough draft for the superior film that would come 18 years later.
Dave Chappelle: The Dreamer (2023)
Dave Trolling the Trolls
As I watched, I could almost hear the frenzied breathing and flying fingers of Outrage Junkies salivating like hyenas over fresh meat. Some folks never get the point. Dave has nothing against gays, lesbians, transgenders, the disabled or any other culturally victimized group. The butts of all those jokes are the ACTUAL bigots, and YOU who can't wait to broadcast a defense of others who never asked you to do so, and often would disagree. When you're "triggered" by words without regard to source and context, you're the one with the self-inflicted problem.
There never was a War on Christmas to whine about; similarly, guys like Dave, Ricky Gervais, Jim Jefferies, etc. Are active off-stage humanitarians, generous with their time and money. For stand-up, they've crafted a persona that includes taunting the Comedy Karens while giving the rest of us plenty of laughs, knowing their jokes contain absolutely no malice. If they weren't pleasing large fan bases, they wouldn't be making the big bucks and drawing so many butts in the seats.
He repeats the frequent criticism that he likes to "punch down" for a satiric point. He's mocking the complainers, not the ones they think they're protecting. Outrage Addicts are lower on the ladder, but they got down there by choice, and deserve to be punched down on more than Chris Rock deserved The Slap.
No one is forced to like this type of humor. If you don't, there are plenty of other options in every medium, running the spectrum from irreverent to devoutly religious, political to observational, etc. Calm down. Change channels and enjoy whatever hits your sweet spot. And stop interfering our EQUAL right to savor what we find funny and/or insightful.
As someone's Grandpa said, "If everybody wanted the same thing, they'd all be chasing Grandma."
Bosch: Legacy: A Step Ahead (2023)
Disappointing second season
I liked the first season a lot, so I waited until I could binge the second without distractions. Alas, it was a letdown in several respects.
The first is that our protagonists are under too much fire from too many sources for way too long. By now you know the specifics. They're all playing defense and circling the wagons for most of the first eight episodes. I'd have preferred the good guys kicking more butts along the way to their upswing in the last two.
The second is that Harry gets a lot of screen time, but none of the best scenes. His savvy remains, but he's relatively inept at things formerly in his wheelhouse - spotting a tail, finding bugs and trackers, anticipating and turning the tables on the bad guys, etc. This year he's more dependent on others.
Crate and Barrel could have lightened the dour mood a bit if given more to do. Maddie, Chandler and Mo get the best moments in the later episodes without Harry. The dude needs to be more central to the solutions if there's a third season.
Helsinki-syndrooma (2022)
Complex, suspenseful Finnish export
Stockholm syndrome threatens to move to another Scandinavian country in this hostage-taking thriller. A Finnish banking crisis in the 1990s caused thousands to lose their homes and businesses with no consequences for the bankers who recklessly lent them more than their assets could justify, knowing the government would protect the lenders, no matter how devasted the naïvely trusting borrowers were when inevitable massive defaults occurred. This is set in the present post-Covid era, with many still suffering from those losses and remaining debts. Hundreds of lawsuits all failed to get compensation because what the banks did was technically legal, according to the courts.
One frustrated victim, Elias (Peter Franzen) decides to finally get to the truth, holding several journalists hostage to force them to ferret out the perceived conspiracy for the benefit of all who suffered such unfair outcomes. That included his father, who'd committed suicide from the shame of losing the family business and saddling his son with the remaining debt. We gradually learn that Elias trained and planned rigorously for the siege for many months. The "curriculum" included explosives to keep the cops out of the office, firearms and hand-to-hand fighting in case things go awry, and conditioning himself for many days without much sleep. He brought in boxes of food and water, plus many boxes of documents for his captives to wade through, hoping they'd find a "smoking gun" that would reverse the tide.
The eight 50-minute episodes cover about the same number of days, switching among the central office, to the police trying to negotiate a surrender or send in SWAT, to a bunch of others who are questioned or otherwise connected to the players and the transactions. The scripts from the four credited writers keep multiple suspense balls in the air throughout, with some surprises along the way. Many characters have arcs that change them from the way they started.
Production values are first-rate, including some large, crowded exterior scenes. Performances are solid all around. As hostage productions go, it's nowhere near as sexy or action-packed as the wildly successful Spanish series Money Heist. Nor is it as light and fast-paced as the 2018 movie, Stockholm, which fictionalized the 1973 bank-hostage situation from which the term Stockholm Syndrome was coined. Even so, it's still intriguing as a more cerebral and less visceral package. Bingeing is advisable, since there are so many participants, locations, financial complexities, political machinations and flashbacks to keep in order. It's written as a miniseries, so no need to worry about having to wait for closure.
Man with a Camera (1958)
Enjoyable, in context
I knew nothing about this series until stumbling across the title while checking Mr. Bronson's IMDb page to see what I'd missed among his legendary body of action flicks. Glad I did.
Theses stories are rather uneven in plotlines, but most are reasonably well done for TV fare of that era - including mostly above-average fight scenes. The casting is sound. A perk of seeing this now is catching future stars (Angie Dickinson, Gavin MacLeod, Sebastian Cabot, William Conrad, among others) in pre-fame roles. The format sending Kovac to many locales to snap his pix allowed a raft of one-and-dones for anyone with a union card.
But most important is this phase in the evolution of the Bronson persona we vividly remember. Few recall when Katherine Hepburn easily beat him up in 1952's Pat and Mike. By this time, he'd changed his name from Buchinsky, en route to becoming the hero of so many gritty westerns and contemporary crime flicks. This Kovac character was tough, but not yet primed to go Full Bronson on the bad guys. His won-lost ratio in the fist fights and shootouts was still lower than it was about to be for the next few decades. The best was yet to come, but this was still pretty good.
The Commish: Dog Days (1994)
Good job by the writers
The sole witness to the murder is Billy, a mentally challenged kid who claims he saw a guy in a van with a dog push the victim from it onto the street. The defense lawyer makes him look unreliable at the preliminary hearing, resulting in a walk for the perp and humiliation for Billy.
Eventually, they find the victim's dog and renew pursuit of the defendant, who has stolen Billy's dog to extort silence from him. When they re-arrest the creep, Billy's dog isn't there.
Convention calls for either (or both) of two steps to resolution: 1 - the vic's dog barks and lunges at the lout that killed his owner, confirming the ID. 2 - they find Billy's dog unharmed for a joyful reunion. Neither is used.
Kudos to the writers for finding an alternative to those tropes. Extra effort deserves recognition.
The Kill List (2020)
So-so martial arts crime flick
This one had enough assets to be better than the uneven action flick it wound up being. Several attractive women provide eye candy; a few of them kick ass in (mostly) fine style. There are plenty of evildoers with minions of henchmen to beat up and/or shoot - a reliable feature of Thai productions. The fights are gritty, without much in the way of f/x hyperbole detracting from the typically fine stunt work.
The script is rather a mess, with too much time on the star, Angie's, childhood trauma and vague, tenuous relations of past to present, and among all the key figures in the principal action. The body count is genre-worthy, but the amount of dialogue seemed excessive for the degree of coherence it contained. A handful of worthy actors were underserved by the writing and direction.
Passable, but hardly memorable, fare.
The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar (2023)
Droll delight built for streaming
List of plusses:
Wes Anderson sets are reliably superb, and as much of a cast member as those who strut and fret their hours upon them.
40 minutes is an ideal running time for a presentation with so little physical movement, and dialogue delivered in such a matter-of-fact tone by a cast showing virtually no emotion throughout. Following that format for a feature-length production would likely grow tiresome, if not exhausting.
Using the stars in multiple roles is just plain cool. Probably fun for the actors, as well, other than the inordinate amount of time some had to spend in wardrobe and makeup.
Had I seen this in a theater, the visuals would have obviously been enhanced, but I'd have had no chance at following the machine-gun pace of the dialogue - or, more accurately, series of monologues. Streaming allows the summoning of subtitle options and pausing or rewinding, as needed. I suspect this would be similarly true for many others who enjoy Anderson's style and haven't read the book.
Leverage: Redemption: The Work Study Job (2023)
Best episode of the season.
As usual, the gang comes up with a fine comeuppance for a charlatan who has it coming. In vaudeville days, this feloniously phony prof would have gotten a steady diet of cream pies in his face. His unraveling here delights in an extra dimension - besides helping the standard sympathetic victim of the jerk du jour, the involvement of the security and custodial staff who have also suffered indignities from this scholastic snob elevates the emotional payoff package way beyond most of the team's other undoings of evildoers.
But one bit in the middle highlights an unfortunate aspect of Redemption compared to the original Leverage run. We need MORE HARDISON! MORE HARDISON! They may be a noble gang of thieves, but he's the one who can really steal a scene.
El conde (2023)
Extremely understated satire that's worth a look
Great premise; oddly executed. Chile's brutal fascistic former leader Pinochet was actually a vampire who started as a soldier in Napoleon's army. This film takes place while he's living in seclusion after faking the death all the world thinks it had witnessed. The Church sends a brilliant young nun there to try saving whatever soul may lie within him, and snatch what she can find among his massive hidden wealth for the Kingdom of God. His non-vampiric wife and five middle-aged children have their own financial aspirations, gathering in anticipation of the REAL death the old guy now wants. Pinochet can't remember where he stashed all the documentation of his global holdings, accounts and investments, so the hunt begins.
This setup could have played out as a zany farce, mocking real-life historic figures, as was done in the delightfully caustic satire, The Death of Stalin (2017). But this pursues a completely opposite comedic direction. It's shot in extremely gloomy B&W, in bleak and barren settings resembling a ghost town in a desert. The lack of color links it to the seminal vampire flicks of the 1930s -'40s, tones down the visceral impact of the gory stuff, and amplifies the craven aspects of human nature. Film students may admire the techniques for sustaining such extreme understatement.
This may unfold too slowly and subtly for many, but the satire hits multiple targets, with a wonderful bonus twist in the last 20 minutes that rewards one's patience.
Massage Parlor Murders! (1973)
A bunch of random crap wrapped around a skin show and a brilliant comedic interlude
I was in the mood for a bit of 1970s sexploitation when I found this odd piece of sleaze. Some nut is brutally killing the hard-working ladies staffing the city's massage parlors. We're treated to a generous supply of boobage with occasional bits of bush. Those displays are linked by the inept efforts of two cops and a handful of scenes seemingly drawn from a hat. Among them are a few poorly written and acted domestic spats; a ludicrous romance; perhaps the longest pointless car chase ever filmed; and performances below the bar even for the era and genre, including corpses still visibly breathing and a long, sloppily framed and edited nude/topless pool scene, wasting a whole lotta nekkedness from a whole lotta extras who had nothing to do with the plot.
But from the midst of that mess arises a brilliant off-the-wall rant from Theodore Gottlieb, early in the metamorphosis into his legendary Brother Theodore persona. If you know the character, that bit alone makes this clunker worthwhile. If you don't, dip your toe in his unrivaled churning waters of rage, non-sequiturs and wisdom. You may hate the guy's shtick, but your cultural education has a gaping hole until you've seen him.
The math for this four-star rating represents1 for the skin and 2 for Theodore, boosting what would otherwise deserve a 1.
Sweating Bullets: The Last of the Magnificent (1993)
Clint makes this my favorite episode
This one drips with nostalgia in the best of ways. First we get Linda Thorson who survived one of the least enviable gigs in TV history - filling Diana Rigg's gogo boots while replacing her iconic Emma Peel in The Avengers series. Then Rob Stewart, who already sounded like Bruce Campbell - especially when cracking wise - evoked memories of his early, underappreciated western series, The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr., furthering their resemblance by also shooting from the left hip.
But what propels this one to the top is Clint Walker's penultimate turn before the cameras as a fictional version of his legendary self. The man who helped define cowboy heroes, mainly as Cheyenne Bodie in his eponymous series in the 1950s - '60s, shines in this role of an elderly oater star writing and performing his own last ride into the sunset. Outstanding for Walker and this series.
The Final Girl (2010)
Tattooed anachronism
Those seeking standard elements like plot, story arcs and character development should look elsewhere. Except for the large ornate tats on most of the cast this obsessively artsy film could have come from the French New Wave Movement of the 1960s -'70s. Narratives were relegated to the back seat in favor of abstract presentations focused on moods, largely via new (at the time) visual concepts.
This emulates most of those components. Sparse dialog; unusually long transitions - as in someone doing a lot of walking with no particular purpose; lenses uncomfortably close to actors; grainy look of bleak sets and mostly-depressed characters within them; random switches from color to B&W; an ending as vague and open to interpretation as a Jackson Pollack painting. All that wrapped around a sprinkling of soft-core moments of sex and nudity, with their erotic value muted by the detached attitudes of the players. Everyone is browsing; nobody's buying. Ultimately more pretentious than entertaining or enlightening.
4Got10 (2015)
What was Dolph thinking?
I've enjoyed a lot of Dolph Lundgren's action flicks - even his numerous low-budget sale-bin offerings. Dolph reliably brings a presence that makes them at least passable, if not all the way up to guilty pleasures.
This one's an outlier, as he plays the nerdiest DEA agent to ever leave his desk for time in the field in a non-comedy. He reminds me of Michael Douglas' geeky turn in Falling Down, first appearing in a nearly identical clothes and Poindexter glasses. The guy looks and acts like an unusually tall guy from accounting or tech support to absolutely no perceptible advantage.
Mercifully, despite his top billing, he's not the star in this rambling twisty crime tale. The plot lurches among the players with good guys turning out not so good, and bad guys who may not be all that bad. It plays out as if they had a dartboard with dozens of scenarios and used whatever the dart hit, in whatever order they were thrown.
Probably Dolph's most missable movie.