Boba Fett
“That guy is the fucking worst.”
“Without a doubt the worst bounty hunter I've ever heard of.”
Boba Fett, also known as The Artist Formally known as Robert 'Bubba' Fett or Bob A. Feet, is an Forty Five year old redneck bounty hunter, part-time actor and well Known Hip Hop Rap Artist. He specializes in rugged, villainous roles, and takes payment exclusively in road kill. He is most famous for his self-titled character in the original Star Wars trilogy. Currently he is on the run due to connections to the 2009 Death of Marvel.
Treading the boards[edit | edit source]
With his new-found confidence, Boba began to excel in all manner of activities. One of his favorite pastimes (apart from courtin' his sister) became acting. Upon a particularly fine performance as Dark Helmet Laser Sword in the school rendition of Space Balls, Boba was noticed by tyrannical Jedi knight George Lucas, who cast him as the now infamous bounty hunter in his blatant rip-off Star Wars movies. Understandably, Boba made the role his own, and has since enjoyed a cult following.
Music Career[edit | edit source]
Before the Forminion Wars Boba was a Hip-Hop star his most famous song was Bobalicious: Condom Used protect it failed Bobalicious definition make them boys go loco They want my bounty so they get their pleasures from my corn rows You could see me, you can't squeeze me I ain't easy, I ain't cheesy I got reasons why I kill'em Jedis they just come and go like my girl friends Bobalicious But I ain't promiscuous And if you was suspicious All that shit is fictitious I blow hyper flash radar beams (zeeeeeeee) That puts them sith on shock, shock And they be lining down the star quadrant just to watch what I got from Tatoine (four, tres, two, uno) So delicious (It's hot, hot) So delicious (I put them sith on shock, shock) So delicious (they wanna slice of what I got from Tatoine) Bobaicious (t-t-t-t-t-tasty, tasty) Bobalicious def-, Fergalicious def-, Fergalicious def- Bobalicious definition make them boys go crazy They always claim they can pwn me Comin' to me call me Bubba I'm the B to the U, B, B the A And can't no other hitman put it down like me I'm Bobalicious My body stay nutritious I be up in the death star just working on my fitness He's my witness I put Darth Vader on shock rock And he be lining down the block just to watch what I got (four, tres, two, uno) So delicious (It's hot, hot) So delicious (I put them sith on shock, chock So delicious (they wanna slice of what I got from tatoine) Fergalicious (hold hold hold hold hold up, check it out Baby, baby, baby If you really want me Honey get some hydro quaques Maybe then you'll get a squaque I'll be tasty, tasty, I'll be maced and crazy It's so tasty, tasty, It'll make you fazzy All the time I turn around always troopers gather round always looking at me up and down looking at my (uuhh) I just wanna say it now I ain't tryin' to round up drama little mama I don't wanna take your jedis And I know I'm comin' off just a little bit conceited and I keep on repeating how Jabba wanna eat it But I'm tryin' to tell, that I can't be treated like clientèle Cuz' they say she Delicious But I ain't promiscuous And if you was suspicious All that shit is fictitious I blow hydro beams (jheeeeeeeeeeee) That puts them sith on shock shock And they be lining down the block just to watch what I got (got, got, got) Four, tres, two, uno My body stay vicious I be up in the death star just working on my fitness He's my witness (oooh wee) I put yo' boy on rock rock And he be lining down the block just to watch what I got (four, tres, two, uno) So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye) So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye) So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye) I'm Fergalicious, t-t-t-t-t tasty, tasty
It's so delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye) So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye) So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye) I'm Fergalicious, t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t (aye, aye, aye, aye)
[Will I Am] L to the 3 to the 3 T Fett you L33T,L to the 3 to the 3 T Fett you L33T,L to the 3 to the 3 T Fett you L33T,L to the 3 to the 3 T Fett you L33T, to the, to the (four, tres, two, uno) D to the E to the L I C I O U S, to the D to the E to the L I C I O U S to the D to the E to the L I C I O U S, to the D to the E to the, to the, to the (four, tres, two, uno)
T to the A to the S T E Y Fett you tasty, T to the A to the S T E Y Fett you tasty T to the A to the S T E Y Fett you tasty, T to the A, to the, four, tres, two, uno D to the E to the L I C I O U S, to the D to the E to the L I C I O U S to the D to the E to the L I C I O U S, to the D to the E to the, to the, to the, to the, to the.....
Michael Jackson, August 31, 2009 Assassinations and Return to the States[edit | edit source]
In order to make Money Boba Fett chose to do some bounty hunting for rich investors, he was hired by Mickey Mouse on August 31, 2009 Arbor Day to kill Thor and the Fantastic Four. He achieved each of his targets on the same date, first killing Thor while he was discussing his movie deal, then proceeded to kill each of the Fantastic Four in their home at the Baxter Building, sparing nobody. He was last spotted near the Canadian boarder with a suitcase of 10 million dollars in unmarked bills.
Recently new evidence also connected Fett to the death of a fellow musical artist Michael Jackson. The King of Pop Michel Jackson. He is currently on the FBI's Top Ten Most Wanted List.
On February 7th, 2010, during an Ewok celebration in Montana for the anniversary of the Sega Empires Downfall, Boba Fett blasted his way over the Boarded and proceed to kill all the Ewoks and ran off with princess Leia. He was heard shouting "Back from the Dead Assholes", Followed by Boba pulling out two lightsabers and shouting "PURPLE RAIN!". Authorities have begun sweeping the area to locate Fett who again disappeared.
On March 20, 2010 Boba released a book and New Album called Freaknik: I didn't do it! detailing the events surrounding the Marvel Killings, and stating he is currently in Cambodia. In his book he states nothing about the death of Michael Jackson.
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Shit/184909791569439
Filmography[edit | edit source]
- Star Wars: The Umpire Strikes Out
- Star Wars: Return Of The Yeti
- Star Wars: The Bedroom Adventures
- Star Wars: The Bedroom Adventures II, The Condom Wars
- Star wars: Return of the Two Towers of the Fellowship of the Ring Clone
- The Star Wars Christmas Special
- The Star Wars Fourth Of July Special
- The Star Wars Kwanzaa Special
- The Star Wars Ramadan Special
- The Star Wars Hanukkah Special (Co Starring Adam Sandler)
- The Star Wars Lent Special (Spoiler: He gave up disintegrations)
- The Star Wars Festivus Special
- The Star Wars Tet Special
- The Star Wars Bodhi Day Special
- The Star Wars Nuclear Day Special (broadcast exclusively in Iran)
- The Star Wars Talk Like A Pirate Day Special
- The Star Wars Bastille Day Special
- The Star Wars Labor Day Special
- The Star Wars Armistice Day Special
- The Star Wars Arbor Day Special
- The Star Wars Jeopardy Special
- The Star Wars Flag Day Special
- The Star Wars Boxing Day Special
- The Star Wars Feast of Maximum Occupancy Special
- The Star Wars Canada Day Special
- The Star Wars We Don't Need A Reason To Party Day Special
- The Star Wars File Sharing Enterprize
- The Phantom Of The Outhouse
- I Know What You Did With Your Cousin
- Eatin' Fried Chicken Wit' Yo' Mamma
- I Smell Nigger
- Assault Of The Cluns
- The Twillight Saga: Eclipse
- Revenge of the Sh*t
- There's Something About Yoda
- Sacrifice: Life of a Mando
- Apocalypse Now
- Smells Like Chewbacca
- Star Wars Play Download Festival
- Star Wars: The Phantom Attack Of The Revenge Of A New Empire Strikes The Return Of The Bruce Lee
- Boba Fett: The Enigma of Diarrheal Passages
