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GA Review

[edit]

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Nominator: IanTEB (talk · contribs) 10:04, 28 March 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 07:38, 8 June 2024 (UTC)[reply]


  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a. (prose, spelling, and grammar):
    b. (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a. (reference section):
    b. (citations to reliable sources):
    c. (OR):
    d. (copyvio and plagiarism):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a. (major aspects):
    b. (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a. (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales):
    b. (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/fail:

(Criteria marked are unassessed)

I have a good amount of time today, so will crack on with this article now! --K. Peake 07:38, 8 June 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox and lead

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  • Why is rock piped to rock music in the infobox but Japanese rock elsewhere?
 Changed the link to Japanese rock
 Done. Also changed the start of the lead to be consistent with the other Hoshino articles
  • "The J-pop and rock single was released by" → "The songs were released as the album's second single by" since the release belongs here and move genre to the sentence of the homage and composition
 Done. Added the sentence "Categorized as J-pop and rock, the single features varied sound throughout its track listing" to the other paragraph
  • To make the first para four sentences, I would recommend adding a sentence about how Hoshino's writing style lacked deep thought and used lines he liked, as the background section mentions for both songs
 Done. I've added this with a semicolon after "Both tracks were written by Hoshino", if you want it completely as its own sentence I can move it, but I thought this flowed well
 Done
 Done
  • Mention the Cherry Blossom theme and that the lyrics describe excitement too
 Done
 Done
  • The sentence about the single's pre-release previews should be swapped and use "first part" to refer to "Crazy Crazy" and second part for the other one, so you are not using their titles repetitively in this para
 Changed to "second A-side" and "the first"
  • "and respectively reached number" → "and respectively reached numbers"
 Done
  • "A black-and-white music video for "Crazy Crazy"" → "A black-and-white music video for the former" with the wikilink
 Done
  • Add a sentence at the end of this para mentioning notable live performances since you did a whole section for this
 Done

Background and production

[edit]
 Done
  • The similarity to "Shiranai" is not sourced
From the Musica interview: "最初は'知らない'みたいな曲だったんですよ。浪々としたというか、悲壮感漂う曲だったの"
  • Remove wikilink on Masatoshi Nakano
 Done
 Done
 Done
  • None of the first sentence in the third para is sourced; is this on page 2 of the source since I cannot get that to translate and if so, please add as a separate ref here?
There's an rp template so I don't think the source needs to be changed. The exact sentence is "J-WAVEの春のキャンペーンソングだったので、じゃあ、桜ソングを作ろうと思って" if that helps
 Done
 Done
 Done

Composition and lyrics

[edit]
  • Audio samples looks good!
  • "and, in certain elements, crazy, supported by a" → "and noted the support of a" since the crazy part is not mentioned in the source
The sentence is: "特にジャズピアノにドスのきいたドラムはいい感じに狂っている" - 狂っている means to be crazy
 Done
  • Not all of the comp is sourced for "Sakura no Mori"; is some from the Apple Music source I can't see?
Could you specify what is missing? All credits should be featured on Apple Music execpt the chorus vocals, which is covered by CDJournal
 Done

Release and promotion

[edit]
  • The source says March 21, not February 21
  • "on February 25," → "on April 9, 2014," per the source
 Fixed
WP:NOTBROKEN, also for convenience since I plan to create an article for this song at some point
 Done
  • "was released through" → "was released as the second single of Yellow Dancer through"
 Done
  • Last para looks good!

Critical reception

[edit]
  • "received positive reviews" → "was met with positive reviews"
 Done
  • "singling out the jazz piano as particularly" → "seeing the jazz piano and thumping drums as particularly" but I don't see the crazy quote unless my translator is bad?
 Done
  • "of the mainstream."" → "of the mainstream"." per MOS:QUOTE and re-invoke the ref since this is a direct quote
 Done
  • "over the "dancing" instrumentation." → "over the dance instrumentation." since quoting is not needed for one word
 Done
  • "not to dance to."" → not to dance to"." but the info here does not seem to be sourced, unless my translator is faulty?
The sentence is "腰で踊らずにはいられない" - I ran it through a translator myself now and it shows "I can't help but dance with my hips", but the reviewer never mentions themself in the text so that is the translator filling in blanks
  • Last para looks good!

Commercial performance

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This is for the Billboard Japan chart but the article seems to be about the US magazine

Live performances

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  • "on Gen Hoshino's YouTube channel." → "on Hoshino's YouTube channel." on the text
 Done
  • Italicize Two Beat in Yokohama Arena
The article is talking about the concert itself and technically not the live album so I think italics would be inappropriate
  • Italicize Count Down TV
 Done
  • Mention the two-day concert was in February
 Done
  • The bass part is not sourced
It is mentioned earlier in the article that Okamoto played bass during the show

Personnel

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  • Use {{spaced ndash}} so there is the right space between credits and personnel and I would recommend adding a div col
 Done. There is a div col and has been for a while; is it not displaying?

Track listing

[edit]
See above comment

Charts

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  • Good

Release history

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  • Flawless, especially that you have started adding various links after I mentioned this before!

See also

[edit]
  • Remove the info as to why the song is relevant since it is expected that see also sections will link to things where relevancy is built in the prose
 Done

References

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  • Copyvio score checks out so quick at 1.0%!!!!
  • Fix MOS:CAPS issues with refs 4, 6, 26, 28, 44, 46, 47, 48, 51 and 54
 Done. I said to myself I was gonna do this before someone picked up the review but must've forgotten...
  • Remove the publisher from refs 14 and 22
 Done
[edit]
  • Good

Final comments and verdict

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  •  On hold after this review went quickly and I congratulate you on the hard work already having brought this article to how good it currently is, even having taken on past suggestions already which is fabulous! --K. Peake 10:50, 8 June 2024 (UTC)[reply]
  • @IanTEB: Well done on such a fantastic response through covering the vast majority of these points, despite some being harder than others! I have edited the adult contemporary part now for clarity since I understand it is not the same as the US version; only thing remaining now is to remove the publishers from the refs I mentioned since citing Mikiki is enough. --K. Peake 07:05, 9 June 2024 (UTC)[reply]
    Done! IanTEB (talk) 08:50, 9 June 2024 (UTC)[reply]