Talk:The Password Game/GA1
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[edit]The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: Kung Fu Man (talk · contribs) 15:34, 26 August 2023 (UTC)
Hello! I've started the review of this article. Some thoughts:
Gameplay
- Under gameplay, the last paragraph feels like it could be merged with the first, as it feels like it completes the thought in the first paragraph and they would be stronger as one.
- The Paul section of the second paragraph and subsequent sentences feel like they could be split into their own paragraph, perhaps leading with a sentence mentioning they're a more complex set of rules involving emojis.
- "showing a death screen based on the Dark Souls games." Possibly wording this a little better may help, consider it for people not familiar with gaming let alone Dark Souls and trying to understand this concept.
Reception
- "other reviewers experienced this." This is a bit of an awkward end to the sentence, could it be clarified or worded better?
Alright, those are my thoughts on the matter. It's a very short article, so not going too ham. I'll do a quick spot check after.--Kung Fu Man (talk) 15:34, 26 August 2023 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review! I believe I've adressed the feedback. Your suggestions for the Gameplay section's paragraph structure are very appreciated, though I made the last paragraph also include another previously mentioned emoji-related rule. I will wait for the check. ObserveOwl (chit-chat • my doings) 17:50, 26 August 2023 (UTC)
Spot check passed on [3], [10], [19]. I'm satisfied with the article overall. Passing.--Kung Fu Man (talk) 18:13, 26 August 2023 (UTC)
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.